“I couldn’t be prouder to win the DeSantis Prize for White Literature,” said Trump VP pick JD Vance. “White people have been persecuted ever since the black slaves arrived in America. I’m finally speaking our truth about people like Kamala Harris who wanted to enslave us and keep our white families drunk, drug addicted, and marginalized from our true potential in America.”

“When Trump told me he raped a prostitute next to a book on a hotel nightstand, I knew we were going to get along. As Cicero said, ‘A room without books is like a body without a soul.’ I feel our shared love for books is a deep bond between us.”

Your Political Soul Deserves A Good Laugh

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