“The upcoming totally and absolutely horrible global depression of 2028 will be completely Joe Biden’s fault,” President Trump said from his Mar-a-Lago office, moisturizing his face with a handful of warm French fries. “In 2025, I inherited a terrible economy from Biden, where Americans were starving to death in the streets, eating their pets to survive, and selling their children to Chinese tourists — who are all infected with the China virus — to make ends meet.”
Research by our Political Americans economic team revealed a different narrative, where facts show that Biden’s administration created 16.6 million new jobs in America, saw soaring stock market gains, and generated a remarkably low unemployment rate of 4.1% upon Biden leaving office in 2025. Biden and the Federal Reserve, in fact, orchestrated a miraculous soft landing after the U.S. suffered through the stressful post-Covid turmoil that impacted the entire global economy.
While the Republican disinformation machine leveraged the fortunes and power of billionaires like Elon Trump to whip up rabid fervor over the price of eggs and aggressive international trade tariffs, the propaganda apparatus shifted into promoting excuses for the second Trump administration. After winning the 2024 election, the Trump administration promptly abandoned any plans to help working-class America. Instead, Trump’s White House continues to transfer billions of US taxpayer money to Trump’s personal accounts and those of his wealthy grifter friends — all while economists now feel the oncoming US recession and resulting global depression is inevitable.
“Joe Biden and his woke DEI agenda are fully responsible for the disastrous depression that will overtake America in the next two or three years,” Trump explained, dipping his French fries into a dog bowl of Diet Coke and mashing them into his mouth.
“Only I can make America great again,” Trump continued, “by ensuring that our media-illiterate nation continues to be manipulated by identity politics and convinced that billionaires want what’s best for the working class.” Trump took a moment to laugh at this statement and then said, in closing, “We’re going to need to raid Medicare and Social Security to offset the losses from the 2028 depression. All because of of Joe Biden and his son, Hunter.”
Political Americans is a satirical publication. All articles are parody and should not be taken as factual reporting.