“It was like being at an Eagles game,” said former House Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-CA). “Our representatives need to learn there is a difference between having a good time undermining democracy and gaming the system for corporations—and flat out uncivilized bedlam. Sadly, it’s time to ban alcohol for Republicans and certain Independents at the State of the Union.”

Arizona Senator Kyrsten Sinema
What’s up my dudes!

“I knew Kyrsten Sinema had been pregaming hard as soon as I saw her dress, but the crass outbursts and rants from our Republican members made us look like insane children,” said Rep. Andy Biggs (R-AZ). “When President Biden, an 80-year old stutterer, embarrasses a bunch of rowdy Republicans in front of America, you know it’s time to stop serving alcohol.”

“I would have shot everyone in there,” said Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO). “It’s probably a good thing they didn’t let me take in my guns. Let’s just say I was feeling it. All that attention. All those cameras. All that booze. It was go time. But all they let me do was yell and make faces. That’s not freedom. That’s not freedom at all.”

Congresswomen Lauren Boebert and Anna Paulina Luna.
Lauren, honey, that’s a really bad idea.

“These people were unbelievable,” said Rep. George Santos (R-NY). “Who the hell acts like that? Screaming. Shouting. People were saying Marjorie Taylor Greene was behaving like a howler monkey. It was bedlam. And I find that insulting, because my mother was a howler monkey.”

New York House Representative George Santos
When I close my eyes, I turn invisible.

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